Hormones are to be blamed for anything and everything during PMS/pregnancy. They are the chemicals that balance us (or not) and are largely responsible for mental health.
I read so much about pregnant women bursting into tears at the slightest thing. Found it funny and ridiculous, having experienced them myself during the first time.
I cried because I didn’t want to go to work. I cried because I’m at work. I cried as people said ‘good morning’ to me. I cried because I saw an advertisement on the bus, featuring a guy with a long arm reaching into a present.
I laughed reading women bursting into tears at a commercial (totally relatable), a movie, an article, or just because someone was too nice or too mean to them.
I didn’t experience much of these crying saga this time round. More angsty and moody than anything.
The first time I burst crying – I’m talking about HUGE sobs, heaving, uncontrollable tearing kind – was because I didn’t get cake during an office celebration. Yep, you read it right.
There was a birthday and they passed down the cake slices by aisle. They assumed my aisle of colleagues have gotten ours (so it wasn’t just me that didn’t get it. 3 of us didn’t) and when I realized that we were left out and there was NO MORE cake left, hot tears sprung into my eyes.
I ran to the bathroom and immediately went into a heaving state. The kind where your eyes blur instantaneously and you howl and your body shakes from immense sadness. It was THAT sad. I had to cover my mouth to stop sounds escaping and raising alarm to toilet-goers. I was fine really, it wasn’t even about the cake, I just felt SO SAD that I DIDN’T have cake. Although, the irony is, if someone had shown or given me cake, I would have burst into more tears.
The more I tried to stop, the more I cried. It took me 10 minutes to finally subside. It was ridiculously funny and silly that this overwhelming sadness just overtakes me. Because after that, I felt ok.
That’s why I said hormones are to blame.
It was obvious I’d been crying and I was very glad that it was close to end of work day. It is the first (of many?) ridiculous funny stories that you can blame hormones on. 😉
Little one, this is for you. 