Welcoming our Happiness!!

14 Jul ‘15

The day you were born.

Your position was ready to come out anytime for a few weeks now. Mommy had to endure the weight and the ever-increasing pressure on my pelvis. I was kinda afraid if you’ll literally pop out anytime.

I didn’t know what kind of contractions pain to expect since I was already in aches and pains anyways. Braxton Hicks’ were more frequent but not long enough to be considered a contraction. I had to keep timing to make sure.

When I was walking up and down the room about 3am, the pains got more intense…time between each one was getting shorter… and faster.

Everyone was eating sahur (pre-dawn meal) when I felt weak and contractions came every 15 mins. Grandma said to call the ward and get going to hospital.

So all of us piled into the car and I started zikir (saying God’s name) and squeezing Daddy’s hands with each contraction.

Warded at 5.40am

I was warded and distributed copies of my birth plan to the nurses. I wanted to be mobile as much as I can.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t have anything to eat. Just plain water to drink so that my bowels would be empty.

Epidural at 9.25am

The laughing gas didn’t work for me. I was adamant not to have epidural but at 9.25am, I gave in.

I couldn’t sit nor stand anymore with each squeeze of the pain. It felt like someone was squeezing my intestines and wrangling it dry.

The nurse gave me the forms to read and the anaesthetist came to explain the procedure.

I had to hold on to Daddy as the anaesthetist tried to find the space in-between my spinal bones. He could only poke the needle in when there was no contraction. It hurts. Sticking a long, thick needle into the back HURTS. I was crying, sobbing so hard from the disappointment of getting the epi even more than the pain itself.

He had to do it THREE times cos the needle couldn’t stick through all the way. Something about me being too bony at the back.

Dilation at 9.50am

I’m at 6cm dilated. The HoD came with some students to say hi. He said I should be giving birth by 2pm.

Waterbag break at 10.30am

A LOT of water and blood gushed out once Prof Su broke my waterbag. That involves putting in a stick-like device with a hook at the end. Yes. It hurts.

By this time, various people had poked me around to check dilation. I couldn’t move at all from the pain and the paralyzed feeling of my legs. The epi made me numb waist down. I couldn’t even prop my legs up myself.

You changed your mind…again!

2pm came and went… and I didn’t feel the contractions at all nor the urge to push.

I started pushing at 3.40pm while the ward called Prof. She was teaching and we can only hope she makes it in time!

Daddy said he can see your thick wad of hair crowning. I couldn’t feel anything and it was hard for me to push.

You were born at 1606h.

My little girl. Our Falisha (happiness).

 

 

Confinement is over!

To be honest, I’m very fortunate that I don’t have a confinement diet. Both sets of parents (mine and in-laws) aren’t particular and they left it to me to manage my own.

It is thus, funny, that today is the 39th day of my so-called confinement. And confinement is over tomorrow – Day 40.

The Asians have a strict confinement period/diet which is passed down from generations. The practices can be dated and very strange (don’t wash hair, ONLY drink red date tea) which was applicable in olden times but not practical in modern, humid Singapore. People don’t bathe in the morning and they have this funky smell in 10mins that they stepped out the door…what more if you can’t/not allowed to wash your hair?! *shudders

Why the month-long period? Confinement basically is the 30-40 day window where your body recuperates from the shock of birth. You take your herbs, rest well (but really, what rest?), and repair yourself to give the best (to come) for baby.

I drank red date/longan/ginger tea, TONS of water to ease the water retention, ate nuts, oats, nursing tea and normal food. When you take everything in moderation, you truly can enjoy them. I didn’t take much spicy food/curries/seafood etc which causes gastric/heartburn/allergy/itch

Further, I’m breastfeeding.so I just have to be careful on curries!

Taking care of little one has left us exhausted and screwed-up body clocks. I didn’t feel confined at all as every waking (and resting) moment was spent taking care of her. Yes, I longed to go out but that was truly secondary when you are running on low battery.

I think I went out thrice during this confinement period. All of them to the docs for follow-ups. Hahah exciting right!

I took delight in visitors…they provide much-needed break and laughter that is lacking. Seriously, I’m a sensitive person and I understand how easy it is to go into (post-natal depression). Imagine, your baby only cries as a form of communication. It is your job to decipher the secret – hunger? tired? sleepy? gas? Fun game really. When it’s one-sided and you are running on no sleep.

I find it extremely in our favour that confinement is over tomorrow aaannnnd it’s also our 2nd year wedding anniversary!!! Just to share… you know how Facebook has that reminder features of yesteryears? It told us that I ‘became friends’ with Hubs on 22 Aug. Haha

We don’t have anything special planned…having little lulu with us for raya and for our anniversary is God’s gift already. And as you can see, He works in all the right ways.

 

Everything is going down… in a good way!

Learning to deal with the fatigue, aches, pain and discomfort is very challenging.

I remember my first trimester – battling nausea, headaches, sleepiness. Mornings and evenings vomiting with hubs holding my hair and massaging my neck. Trying to stop the vertigo on the way to work and battling crowds. Because you are still not showing in the first trimester, you just come across as pale and sick. No one would give you a seat (even now, though I’m heavily pregnant. Available seats are a commodity in SG!) and you struggle to keep your nausea from colleagues until you have confirmed or the first developmental months are over.

There were days that I drifted off to sleep during work. Eyes rolling about like I was possessed and then fatigue overwhelmed me. At home, the bed was a lovely companion. I just wanted to embrace the covers and never let go.

Napping as and when you can (truly catnaps!) helps recharge. I am lucky to have a corner in the office where staff goes to sleep. If you don’t have such a nook, your desk would have to do. Unfortunately, as you get bigger, you can’t lean forward to rest. I have a stool to put my legs up and I have a thick cushion for my back, another cushion for my bump and cover myself with a shawl before I sleep.

Due to relaxing muscles and ligaments, everything is in pain. I’d rather say discomfort because little one isn’t causing me pain. J She’s a joy to carry, so active and curious, and we can’t wait to welcome her!

All these discomfort (difficulty in turning and walking, discomfort down there, discomfort everywhere!) drains my energy, or whatever I have left. She is very active so I break out in (more) cold sweat too.

I used to say ‘Everything is going to get worse’ and I mean it in the best way possible. You and I know that clothes get smaller and tighter, your mood isn’t up to date, your appetite/sense of smell is way off and your aches get worse. It’s all part of this wonderful journey.